(no subject)

[vintage_belle]

I will say right off that I fully expected to be torn to shreds. I didn't put a whole lot of plot into my story. I started off in the middle and ended in the middle - it has no real beginning or end because it's a fragment of the whole. The characters are fully developed in my mind, and the five pages (that was the maximum I could write) was spent glossing over certain aspects of them because I already knew what I wanted from them.

Rhys (rhees) is an often sarcastic and overly friendly first generation Welsh-American. Personal space? There is no such thing. He likes puzzles and enigmas and there is little that annoys him. He is mostly attracted to men.

Xanian (zan*e*an) is the eccentric son of wishes-they-were-hippie parents (hence the name) who prefers books to people. He also has no opinions on anything, except he does, he just doesn't talk to you about them. He is gay.

That is all that needs be known about them for the five pages of 'Rhys and Xanian get together, or do they?'. The whole point of the story was that it's open ended, because it's about Rhys figuring out more of who Xanian is. Rhys is fascinated by Xanian (he's been following him around the office for five years) and whether or not they get together has nothing to do with that.

It's amazing what people don't get.

Aside from my initial surprise of 'holy shit people actually liked it' (because people actually did), I did learn a few things.

1. Apparently, Rhys is too Sci-Fi to be a modern name. (No, it's just English.)
2. Apparently, co-workers don't ever eat lunch together. Ever. (Huh. My mom used to go out with her co-workers all the time.)
3. Apparently, you're not allowed to use brunette to describe a brown-haired man and blonde is only for women. (I really wish people would tell me these things, 'cause I'd never heard that before.)

Comments

[dreitropfenblut.livejournal.com]

WTF... I mean, sometimes you hear things in a critique that you don't like, but are a matter of opinion, however... Rhys is a perfectly normal name (How is it even *remotely* "sci fi" especially next to Xanian???), Co-workers eat lunch together all the damn time, and I've never heard that brunette was only for women...

The blonde thing is half true... in gendered languages that have the word "blond" (French is the only thing coming to mind) blonde is feminine and blond is masculine. English doesn't technically have blonde with an e, though I think it looks prettier so I use it. :P

[gimmick-game.livejournal.com]

HA! Not eating with co-workers. I laugh at that.


And the blonde thing was explained to me by my AP English teacher. Blonde for women, Blond for men. That's all I was ever told.

[coffeebruise.livejournal.com]

...Rhys is sci-fi? o.o I've known people with that name. D: *lives in a sci-fi world?*

Dude, I eat lunch with my co-workers. My mom eats with her co-workers too. =_=

I've never heard the hair thing (then again, I suck at writing >D).

I don't know. Class critiques....never seem to be useful. u__u;

[24-centuries.livejournal.com]

The last time I had original writing critiqued, I was in high school where most kids aren't even paying attention so I can only imagine what you experienced here.

But ... are they people who made those comments STONED?

For "Rhys" - John Rhys Davies and Jonathan Rhys Meyers popped into my head right away. I hope you responded with "No, it's just English." because that made me LOL =) Is it an open forum with people giving verbal feedback or are the papers handed back with written feedback?

The co-workers thing is just LAUGHABLE. Seriously. I work at a SUPERMARKET! and we even do it THERE!

Regarding the hair - I know that in french, you change the blonde to blond when dealing with masculine so I've always done that in writing. I've seen brunette spelled "brunet" but I don't know if that's accurate or not. Were there suggestions? Like tow-headed for the blond or something?